My sheets look like a crime scene.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
