YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
