nut hugger
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
false alarm. still invincible.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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