In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
Randomize
