I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
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