I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize