So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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