You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Randomize
