I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
You brought string cheese to the strip club
Randomize
