Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
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