just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
Randomize
