I tried to use my car keys to open my door
I just started a sentence with yellow.
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
Randomize
