Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
