You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
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