Three words: puerto rican gang bang
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
My life is pants optional.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
