one might say we're banned from that church
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
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