the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Randomize
