how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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