sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
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