physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
