Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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