It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Randomize
