I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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