I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
