How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
Randomize
