so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
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