My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
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