He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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