I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
Randomize
