Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
