508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
Randomize
