Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I've blown a few things in my day
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Randomize
