on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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