I'm pants shitting drunk right now
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
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