I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
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