are you still at the devil's house?
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize
