Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
Everyone says I win the strip club
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
Randomize
