All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
How does it feel to date your dad?
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize
