i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
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