I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Randomize
