he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
he told me I talked like a deaf person
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
I just got a text giving me an hour window for when my vibrator is gonna be delivered. If that's not awesome customer service, I don't know what is.
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
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