I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
