so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
