I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
Randomize
