a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Randomize
