Only a mothe r could love this liver
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
