If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
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