i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
Then you guys just all showered together...?
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
Randomize
