I bet he comes in French.
i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
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