Hey man sorry I got all grabby
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
Randomize
