afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
Randomize
